“If a little dreaming is dangerous, the cure for it is not to dream less but to dream more, to dream all the time.” – Marcel Proust
I don’t dream or have as much fun as I used to. Unlike other entries, I am not putting myself down. In fact I am admitting a change which has been slowly occurring.
After years away, applying for college has my hopes high yet I’m a little antsy at the prospect of going back . I know I want to finish more than I ever have.
Day by day, my mind wanders to the past: days gone by when I seemed to at the peak of my powers and the boundaries of my personal ambition.
What I shed…was the abominable pride which festered within. Because I have experienced and fully realize the cost of such sins.
However, I would only be deceiving myself if I said my scars wouldn’t have revealed themselves at all. I can only atone.
Atone in a manner that goes against what I have practiced beforehand: commitment.
Going forward, I must.
Otherwise, the future looks very mundane.
The grocery store will keep me as long as I work well. But I don’t even like to think about finishing the year there, much less a decade.
Don’t get wrong…I am blessed to be employed. There are many out there who are not.
Despite that, something in my bones calls for more…
I aim to get it.
Bye for now, KS.