it has him begging for scraps,
everyone has an opinion,
as he keeps score,
like what you think matters!
what you do does,
the World tallies action as merit,
the rest goes unscored,
you’re missing out,
as that chalk goes to the chalkboard,
guilt in arbitrary form,
adding it up,
like an equation that holds meaning,
drop that stick of chalk,
see what’s around you,
make a choice,
take a stand,
change the narrative….
of your life,
“You have a brain in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.” – Dr. Seuss
As always, I find myself struggling with the nature of my own existence. What’s different is how many around me actually care – I know how Peter felt after crying wolf so many times. It’s just me now….and I still have to do it.
I am who I am and the key to everything is to accept who I am, fully and honestly. Yeah, I lied to myself too!
That’s why I say whatever is on my mind without caring for the repercussions because I don’t have time. My clock went to zero a long time ago.
I also hold anxiety when it comes to being and remaining single. Unlike other heterosexual males, I see little to no merit in it.
I simply don’t.
At my age, I’m in a peculiar place and I don’t think any one thing will help change where I’m at.
I hear, “just do this, just do that….you have to start somewhere.”
My trepidation is palpable.
I find that the closer you get to people, the more truth matters; you can’t lie about who you are or what you’ve done because eventually, the true story will surface.
Believe me, it always surfaces.
So it matters to be whoever you truly are, while you have the opportunity to be.
The only reason I know I still have one is that I’m here, taking breaths, and so irritated by discontent that I need to do better.
It burns white-hot in me.
Because I don’t who could accept this….
Bye for now, KS.
I call for a truce,
with the boundaries.
with the ones I don’t forgive,
with the “treasures” hidden in this past,
I do not care,
I refrain from acknowledgment,
You rather witness my collapse,
well, I can assure you…
it is going to happen,
set in the stars,
shine on me little suns,
while you burn into your destiny,
mine is too hot to touch,
oven mitt be damned!
I don’t have time,
so I need one thing from you:
a brief armistice.
you struck like lightning,
pounded like rain,
smirked at the Sun,
and tried to chill to the bone,
you changed the rules,
in your winter-tide,
a wintry exchange,
you barely tickled us,
yet snowflakes remain,
you change the rules,
on your own,
cold in your embrace,
dance in frosted flakes,
you are changing the rules,
is it mean to call you an ice queen?
The plainness of platitudes,
an expression given life,
a little dollop of sauce!
it has become…
commonplace in a stretch,
of voices run rampant,
voices run rampant!
do you hear that?
that anomalous cliche,
an immovable outlier,
the unreasonable man,
whose words may mean nothing now,
in the storm of society,
I just vie for listeners,
to be heard,
to be heard!
TO BE HEARD!
THANKS TO ALL WHO HAVE DONATED! THE HELP IS REALLY APPRECIATED!
Bye for now, KS.
It has been long while since I last posted here.
In the interim, I have had my share of dealing – dealing with this, that, the other. 😉
Living in post-election America has been a chore but my faith in humanity has not shifted much.
I think it is due to the fact that I truly respect others and their differences…which is not easy as it sounds.
I mean it is so natural to let our anger and misunderstanding of difference get to us.
The hard work comes when you understand where you stand, how important it is, and how equally important is for the opposite side – whether you agree or not.
None of us are in a position to judge each other: we are simply human – imperfection personified.
Aside from that, my mother has been dealing with her own issues – her health mainly and how it effects her in the present and her future.
In aforementioned posts, I have been upfront about needing significant help which is still true.
- Please click on the link in – GO FUND ME:JEFFREY’S VITAL PLEA
- Please consider making a donation
- Say a prayer or send positive vibes this way – any effort will be much appreciated.
All of that said, self-improvement is the main goal.
I have been a total mess most of my thirty-five years and all I care about is growth.
So I am taking steps to ensure that.
Hopefully, it takes. 🙂
Bye for now, KS.